Packing Light

Letter Eleven shifted this morning.

As I lay in bed, my eyes still swollen from crying yesterday, I realized I could not write what I had planned to write today.

Monday was emotionally heavy. Things beyond my control were said and done, and if I am being honest, it hurts.

The grief is heavy.
The pain is heavy.
And today, I just need to set it down for a minute.

Maybe you do too.

As I lay there thinking about that, my mind went to the backpack I will carry on the Camino.

I have spent so much time thinking about what belongs in it. What do I actually need? What can I leave behind? How much weight can I comfortably carry mile after mile?

Because that is the thing about a backpack. Something can feel light when you first pick it up and feel completely different after you have carried it for miles.

I think our hearts are like that too.

Sometimes it is not one enormous thing that makes life feel so heavy. It is everything we have kept putting into the backpack. The grief. The unanswered questions. The things we cannot control. The conversations we replay. The people we love. The outcomes we desperately wish we could change.

We keep walking and carrying until one morning we realize.

This is heavy.

And maybe the answer is not to become stronger today.

Maybe we simply need permission to set the backpack down for a minute.

Packing light on the Camino

Packing light is one of the most practical lessons of the Camino. Everything a pilgrim puts into a backpack becomes something the body has to carry, step after step, mile after mile. An item that seems insignificant while packing at home can feel very different after hours on the road.

The lesson is simple. Every ounce has to earn its place.

Maybe our emotional backpacks deserve the same consideration.

We do not always know how heavy something is until we have carried it for a while. Grief can be heavy. Uncertainty can be heavy. Waiting can be heavy. Trying to control an outcome can be heavy. Even hope can feel heavy when we have been holding it for a long time.

Packing light does not mean nothing is important. It means being intentional about what we are willing to carry.

Sometimes the backpack itself has not changed. We have walked farther. We are tired. The hill was steeper than we expected. Something that felt manageable yesterday feels different today.

When that happens on the Camino, I can stop. I can take the backpack off my shoulders. I can set it down and rest.

I do not have to throw everything away. I do not have to abandon the road. I do not have to call myself weak.

I can simply set it down for a while.

Maybe that is a kind of rest too. Rest that does not just restore the body, but frees the soul.

Today's Study

Read: Hebrews 12:1 through 3

Before you keep reading, take a few minutes and read Hebrews 12:1 through 3 slowly.

Pay attention to these phrases. Throw off everything that hinders. Run with perseverance. The race marked out for us. So that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

Then read the passage again, this time as a pilgrim.

Imagine yourself at the beginning of a long road with a backpack strapped to your shoulders. Every single thing you packed is something you have agreed to carry.

Hebrews does not only tell us to throw off sin. It also says to throw off everything that hinders.

That matters to me today, because some of the heaviest things we carry are not bad things.

Sometimes we are carrying grief because we loved deeply. We are carrying questions because something mattered. We are carrying disappointment because we hoped. We are carrying concern because we care. We are carrying an outcome because we desperately wish we could change it.

Something can matter deeply and still be too heavy to carry every minute of every day.

So maybe the question is not how much more I can hold.

Maybe the goal is not to become strong enough to carry a heavier backpack.
Maybe it is to become wise enough to know what belongs in it.
~ Jenn

Which brings me to the only thing I am going to ask you today.

What is in your backpack that God never asked you to carry?

Camino Challenge: Set Down the Backpack

No deep dive today. No long journal exercise.

Just finish these three sentences.

• What feels heavy today?
• What have I packed in my emotional backpack that I no longer want to carry?
• What do I need to set down today?

You do not have to figure out what happens tomorrow. Just set it down for today.

Prayer

Tomorrow We'll Walk...

I kept telling you the hills were coming.

Monday turned out to be the hill.

So today I am sitting down on my pack for a minute, and looking out over the top of it at the rest of the road.

Tomorrow is lighter, and I am not going to apologize for it.

Today I set the backpack down. Then, a little later, I went and got it back out. I tried on the hiking pants. I attached the pins my daughter bought me. I printed the final itinerary with every confirmation number on it.

All the fun parts. None of the hard ones.

Tomorrow I am going to tell you about the things most people forget when they prepare for the Camino. Not the socks. Everybody has a list for the socks.

The other things. The ones you do not think about until you are six days out and standing in your bedroom in a pair of hiking pants.

For today, set it down. That is enough.

What do you need to set down today? Write me back below. I read every one.